Wednesday, December 22, 2010

What Grinds My Gears: Winter Edition

I really do love the winter months, with all of the holidays, like Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, my wedding Anniversary. It truly is a great time of year as the temperature drops and fires are made in fireplaces, gallons of hot chocolate and apple cider are consumed, and the leaves fall off the trees in the crisp winter air. But there are just a couple of funny things that get under my skin during the winter months. Welcome to "What Grinds Jason's Gears: Winter Edition" in which I will describe a few things about the winter months that I have noticed that are not so awesome. Enjoy!

You know what grinds my gears in the winter? Static electricity! I mean come on! It's already bad enough that it's cold outside but then you have to get shocked because of the cold dry air!? I am mainly referring to vehicles. I mean, you leave the house, jump in the car and blast the heat. You finally get warmed up at your destination but then when you get out, you get moderate dosage of voltage from the car. I guess it's because the metallic car is moving rapidly through very dry cold air, but,... really vehicles. I'm tired of getting shocked every time I close the car door! I definitely can't wait until that ends and I can close the doors in peace.

You know what else grind my gears? Getting into a cold bed! I mean, there's really nothing you can do unless you have like a heated blanket. But who buys those! You always think of the bed as a warm and comfy place but no-ho, not in the winter, not at first. You have to get in your PJ's and then climb into a freeze chamber because the sheets and blankets are cold and the mattress is cold. Your poor toes end up going numb and you have to curl into the fetal position to keep warm. Granted, it only lasts for a little while but it'll be nice when we have to use the fan in the summer to cool down the sheets.

Finally, you know grinds my gears about winter!? Freezing cold toilet seats! I mean, come on! Really? I can't believe there has never been a solution to freezing your butt cheeks off when you have to go to the bathroom in the winter. They should make like a built in toilet seat heater or something because there is probably nothing worse than sitting down on a ring of ice before carrying out natural body processes. It's so cold that sometimes you don't even want to go to the bathroom because you know the ensuing feeling of icy icicles is going to sting your gluts and hammy's! So you just have to suffer through for the first few minutes while you transfer your own heat to the porcelain torture ring so that you don't end up with further medical complications. I'll be glad when the seats are no longer cold...that's for sure.

That's all that grinds my gears in the winter, so not too many things.  I hope you enjoyed some of the funny things about winter that I have noticed that are not the most pleasant. And if you have anything that you love or dislike about the cold winter months then let us know!

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